kehinki:

Trying to spill my emotions about Sam/Steve

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cacchieressa:

shinykari:

jetplanejane:

Remember who you are

DYING

the best part of this, though, is that steve waits until he’s saved the world to do it - like, he’s completed *his* mission, and now he can lay down and die, can let bucky kill him if necessary, because even if he’s saved the world (again!), he doesn’t want to live in it without bucky again (lbr, he didn’t want to do it the first time- there is not a significant passage of time between bucky falling from that train and steve refusing to eject from the valkyrie - i don’t think it’s a conscious suicide attempt, but he’s certainly not invested in getting out alive, and nothing that’s happened to him since has really ameliorated that; steve’s always been reckless, but his recklessness has a death-wishy edge to it post-bucky’s death), not now that he knows bucky’s alive. he’s already admitted he doesn’t know how to be happy in this brave new world, every certainty he had has been shaken, and then he discovers that his best friend - whose death he carried - suffered a fate worse than death, because if you’re dead they can’t kill you over and over again by turning you into a thing to be used, a weapon to be aimed and fired and then put away until the next time, and steve blames himself for that, for the fact that even after he grew eight inches and a hundred pounds, he still wasn’t good enough, strong enough to save bucky. but here it’s not physical strength that saves him, but love, because steve’s heart has always been his strongest muscle.

caughtinanocean:

I am morally, socially, and in all other ways obligated to flail a lot about the incomprehensible, overwhelming amount of things that Steve Rogers feels about Bucky Barnes. Because, well, I have a lot of feelings about his feelings. Readers be advised — everything beyond this point is spoilers for Captain America: The Winter SoldierAnd I mean serious spoilers — like for the entire movie. Everything. You’ve stopped reading if you haven’t seen it, right? Okay!

Steve Rogers is the man who always stands up. He never runs when faced with an unfair fight, and he never surrenders — not when he’s 95 pounds of health problems held together with nothing but spirit, and not when he’s a serum-enhanced, 240-pound wall of muscle. But when he first sees Bucky’s face, he just lets it all drop. Faced with a Bucky who does not seem to know him (screaming, desperate emotions about the fact that Bucky knew that he knew Steve to come at a later date) — or in fact, his own name — Steve Rogers, quite possibly for the first time in his life, gives up. 

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The fact that this man on the bridge calls him ‘Bucky’ when everyone else calls him ‘the assetreally, really, fucking really screws with him. You can almost see the schematics of the programming whirring behind his eyes and that SPARK there, like he didn’t have a name before this stranger gave him one? Carries through to the next scene, which I am going to admit is my absolute favourite; oh my GOD. OH MY GOD he played it like a child who wants something like a child who really just WANTS THIS ONE TOY FOR CHRISTMAS like he’s trying to make his inner landscape come to life just so he knows he’s not crazy. ‘I knew him,’ he says, and iI bit teethmarks into my hand. It’s the single strain in his mind; the only thing strong enough to counter the kill order, and he keeps repeating it like a drowning man with a lifeline, the only thing in this haze. ‘But I knew him.’ he says; and he’s trying to CONVINCE Pierce as much as trying to state it - if it only exists inside his head (the head that’s been wiped so many times by so many people, the mind that’s been scrubbed clean and then frozen and scrubbed clean and then frozen - ) then does it really exist? ‘But I knew him.’ he’s trying to convince himself as much as anyone, he only wants to know that he hadn’t imagined it. He nods a little, to make his point. This usually works. This is his mission report. They always believe his mission report. It’s so obvious he doesn’t even think of himself as a person; he’s an asset, and he’s a tool (he would be MORE THAN CAPABLE of taking out the entire room, but he doesn’t; why? why?) and he’s never registered the need or even desire to be anything else until this day, and all he wants is to remember, because it threw him and it unsettled him and it’s for the mission and won’t you please let me remember - 

(x)

(Source: winterpatriot, via cacchieressa)

eatingcroutons:

requiodile:

kaciart:

So my sis and I were talking about the scene where Bucky is wiped in the movie. 
His panicked breathing and how sometimes when his arm needs work he flashes and is back in that chair expecting agony. Steve was probably across the room and he heard the heart monitor picking up and turned to see Bucky’s rapidly rising chest like in the movie.
Tony pauses warily because ‘Tony vrs Metal arm’ is not a result he’s interested in discovering the statistic of so Cap takes a seat and tries to both understand what is going on, and also to reassure Bucky of his presence. 

#I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT THIS #of how he stays perfectly still but his pulse is skyrocketing and he’s breathing like a bellows #while tony starts and pauses and starts and pauses and starts and pauses #because that damn arm could punch through his chest and kill him before he could scream #but tony’s dead pale for another reason too #the arm itself is an act of supreme violence upon bucky #and much like how tony’s arc reactor hadn’t been a willing or concious addition to his body #both the arm and the arc reactor extend beyond life or use into identity #and in bucky’s case #a total lack thereof #but steve recognizes this in both of them maybe #and he keeps himself close and visible at all times #continuously murmuring comfort and security 

OH NO REQUI MADE IT WORSE

eatingcroutons:

requiodile:

kaciart:

So my sis and I were talking about the scene where Bucky is wiped in the movie. 

His panicked breathing and how sometimes when his arm needs work he flashes and is back in that chair expecting agony. Steve was probably across the room and he heard the heart monitor picking up and turned to see Bucky’s rapidly rising chest like in the movie.

Tony pauses warily because ‘Tony vrs Metal arm’ is not a result he’s interested in discovering the statistic of so Cap takes a seat and tries to both understand what is going on, and also to reassure Bucky of his presence. 

#I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT THIS #of how he stays perfectly still but his pulse is skyrocketing and he’s breathing like a bellows #while tony starts and pauses and starts and pauses and starts and pauses #because that damn arm could punch through his chest and kill him before he could scream #but tony’s dead pale for another reason too #the arm itself is an act of supreme violence upon bucky #and much like how tony’s arc reactor hadn’t been a willing or concious addition to his body #both the arm and the arc reactor extend beyond life or use into identity #and in bucky’s case #a total lack thereof #but steve recognizes this in both of them maybe #and he keeps himself close and visible at all times #continuously murmuring comfort and security 

OH NO REQUI MADE IT WORSE

(via black-nata)

I'm with you till the end of the line.

(Source: hiddlesy, via black-nata)

kaciart:

moonslippers answered: On the nightmare idea, Bucky somehow hurts Steve while he’s trying to wake him and in the morning Steve tries to hide the evidence.
braidedribbon said: Either of them waking up from a nightmare and needing comfort and cuddles.
hottiemcgreeneyes answered: Bucky wakes up after a nightmare about his past and Steve is there to comfort him

kaciart:

moonslippers answered: On the nightmare idea, Bucky somehow hurts Steve while he’s trying to wake him and in the morning Steve tries to hide the evidence.

braidedribbon said: Either of them waking up from a nightmare and needing comfort and cuddles.

hottiemcgreeneyes answered: Bucky wakes up after a nightmare about his past and Steve is there to comfort him

(via swingsetindecember)

while I’m out here, slogging through the mud, breathing fire,
and getting stabbed to death

(Source: everyprettygun, via swingsetindecember)

permissiontogoafterhim:

Steve with glasses Appreciation post [x]

(via swingsetindecember)

reservoir-fantasy:

"Who the hell is Bucky?”

(via swingsetindecember)

You’re my friend.

(Source: alphalewolf, via swingsetindecember)

reservoir-fantasy:

"I need to remember.”

(via swingsetindecember)